10 ways to build intimacy with your partner
“Being in a long marriage is a little bit like that nice cup of coffee every morning – I might have it every day, but I still enjoy it.”— Stephen Gaines
Intimacy in a long term relationship or a marriage is not just about physical intimacy it is also about emotional intimacy, romance, and closeness. Maintaining intimacy in a relationship is about being together and about creating and continuing a healthy relationship with your partner. In a long-term relationship, couples usually tend to take the little things for granted and leave romance on the wayside.
Many relationships start out with a burst of intimacy, but how do you keep that connection strong and long-lasting forever? To maintain the spark in your relationship, you need to express yourselves so that it can enhance the lacking intimacy in your marriage/relationship.
And if you love each other, then there’s nothing stopping you from bringing back that spark, that heady onrush of first love back to your relationship.
Here are some suggestions that will surely let you maintain or build the lacking intimacy in your marriage/relationship in spite of your busy schedule. All you need is a bit of effort on your part to see the result. There are certain things that you can do to encourage intimacy in your marriage.
So, here we suggest you 10 sure ways that will help you build intimacy in your marriage or relationship:
1. Make sure to be able to spend quality time with each other.
It is important for a couple to be able to spend a joyful time together at the end of the day sharing one’s experiences and other happenings throughout the day.
Free your schedule every day to spend quality time with your partner, talk about the mundane things, the funny things that happened at work, or even what the dog did while you took it for a walk.
The ability to laugh and share one’s grief with one other is a true sign of liveliness in a relationship. The point here is to reconnect with each other, so avoid talking about something which might descend into an argument or a fight.
2. Plan mandatory date nights
In spite of your busy schedules, you can come up with something new and exciting to do on your date nights every week so that you can avoid the ruts out of long term relationships.
It would even add to the excitement quotient if you could surprise your spouse with the things he/she loves on your date night. The main point is here to share thoughts and responsibilities and caring for something g what your partner enjoys.
Suggestively going bowling one week, a sunset picnic, visiting some love themed restaurant, going for a late-night movie or just a walk might be of great help to build intimacy in your relationship.
3. Pursue common interests
You and your spouse might be a totally different person but there is something common between you which has brought both of you together.
Therefore find a common area of interest or hobbies like love for music, playing instruments, running, sports, favorite television shows, gardening and many more, which you will enjoy doing together.
This acts as a team will also help you enhance your relationship and will solve the intimacy issues in your marriage thus creating a great bond between the two.
4. Plan for a mini-holiday/ mini-honeymoon
How long has it been that just the two of you have spent time together in some holiday destination like a hilly cottage with a small fireplace? Grab your opportunity whenever possible and plan a trip with your partner to know each other better and to spend time together.
Or just plan for a picnic in a park, beach or a garden or maybe a day trip somewhere nearby or a spa day together to get couples’ massage to be with each other. Dedicating your time for one another will also help in strengthening your relationship with your partner.
5. Spend some time apart from each other on purpose
Plan a weekend trip or a friends’ night out with your respective friends; purposely spend time apart, so that when you meet after the time apart, you’ll have so much to share and bond over it.
The absence of Each other can make you feel the love and affection for one another. Giving your spouse their personal space, allowing them to miss you will get you the appreciation for all the things one does for the other.
This will not only get you importance in your relationship but will also improve your intimacy once you are together again after a gap.
6. Surprise each other
Leave an hour early from office and make a special dinner for him or get surprise gifts for him and maybe plan something more which your spouse loves like a massage or inviting his friends down-home just to allow him to have some guy’s time.
Women love getting flowers, get flowers delivered to her workplace to surprise her and make her day special or maybe you can surprise with a basket full of romantic items. This point will definitely help you solve the intimacy issues in your marriage.
7. Let go of expectations
It is easy to get into a relationship with an idea of loving and living happily ever after, but that idea isn’t usually realistic as after a certain time in your relationship, you need to focus on giving love without any fail and without any expectations.
You may look up to certain things like romance, passion, physical intimacy or a constant togetherness and if you do not receive them then you will suffer from depression and this might create issues in your marriage.
Therefore, it is a better option to let go of expectations and give love to your partner without expecting to receive love the same way as yours.
8. Pay attention to your partner
One of the most effective suggestions to maintain intimacy in your marriage is by paying attention to your spouse. Just like while driving if you use your mobile phone you might lead to a dangerous accident, same is the case here, if you do not pay attention to your partner during a conversation then you might just miss something important which might lead to misunderstanding in your relationship leaving your partner emotionally hurt and lonely.
Thus, to build and maintain intimacy in a relationship you need to be present with your partner mentally, emotionally and physically.
9.Maintain Eye Contact
Just like the famous saying goes ‘eyes are the windows to one’s soul’, maintaining eye contact with your partner during a conversation will send the signal to him/her that you are important to him and his words are really meant for you.
Gazing into one’s eyes doesn’t only mean that you paying attention to the conversation but also of being intimate. Eye contact shows trust and emotional bonding, and also increases the feeling of being understood by the partner.
10. Try a weekly or monthly sit-in
You might be living a smooth happy long term relationship or maybe you are going through a rough phase in your relationship, you might be having a very busy schedule at work or maybe you are scared to bring up any topic about the issues in your relationship, but a weekly sit-in discussion is very essential to maintain the intimacy of a relationship. The most effective way to sit-in is to face each other while one person speaks, the other listens without interrupting and vice-versa.
You can say whatever is running in your mind honestly and truly, whatever problems you are facing in the relationship and how the relationship is going and sort out problems and issues with one another. This sit-in process will help you lead a beautiful life with your partner and will also develop intimacy amongst the two.
Healthy relationships with growing intimacy is no hard work but just a matter of time for each other as it is teamwork and intimacy can’t be build up alone without the support of your partner.
A perfect relationship full of effortless conversations, shared secrets and a sense of certainty is not what every couple manages to continue that closeness as time moves on. Therefore, we have come up with 10 sure ways that will help you maintain a more intimate relationship with your partner.